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Young Volcanoes

by Zac Clark

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1.
cut myself on guns and roses, drinking in the afternoon. lost my mind and hoped you’d notice. looked your way and thought i’d tell the truth: i need to see you soon. but you’re everybody’s baby now, aren’t you? walked it off and poured it back on, bumped up when i slid back down. found myself in foreign rooms and houses. we float like phantoms in this town; i just hope you’ll come back around. but you’re everybody’s baby now, and i wish you were mine all of the time. you’re everybody’s baby now, and i wish you were mine. i do this all so often it’s like i’m seeing if my heart still beats. try just as hard to get and forget. knew you’d leave but hoped you’d stay with me. one more drink and we’ll be sleeping on the street. i see you in the strangest fucking places when i’m wasted. you are every girl i meet and darling you’re taken.
2.
all false starts and perfect lines for lives they don’t describe, i never tried to find much more than easy words; but lately i’ve been looking cause i think you’re worth the search. and you deserve to make a secret of your answers. you deserve to take your time. so if you say that you think you can believe me, i’ll wait right here while you’re making up your mind. i don’t want to take you home, but i’ll keep quiet cause i think you know that i just want to sing you to sleep. looked long enough at fireworks and shooting stars to hope you’re more than just a spark that fades away. lately i’ve been hoping something beautiful would stay. and if you’d stay, you could make a secret of your answers, cause you deserve to take your time. and if you say that you think you can believe me, i’ll wait right here while you’re making up your mind. i don’t want to take you home, but i’ll keep quiet cause i think you know that i just want to sing you to sleep. all of the stars are in disarray; we see what we tell ourselves to see. you can believe anything that you make yourself believe, so believe in me.
3.
dear, i should confess to you: i’m sinking like a stone. i could not care less for you. but you can’t sleep alone, so we both get what we want when your eyes say, “you know me well enough to know you’re never gonna know me at all” cause i agree. but baby, it don't really faze me. you don’t have to save me; you don’t even have to wake me. just let yourself out and become someone else. so when we meet again it’s almost like we’re seeing ghosts. we let hope rise up in the back of our throats, cause we know, i suppose. but we choke when we get close. and you blow the words like smoke when you whisper, “you know me well enough to know you’re never going to know me at all.” i agree, but baby, it don't really faze me. you don’t have to save me; you don’t even have to wake me. just let yourself out and become someone else. if you’re gonna give me what i want, then who am i not to take it? if you’re gonna give me what i want, then who am i? well you know me…
4.
Wait 04:01
i’ll stay up all night wondering if my timing’s right, and if it ever was or will be. i’ll toss and turn. swear i’ll keep your heart safe here from the start, something he never thought was necessary. ah, but you live and learn. i know you fear if we talk that my voice cuts out, if you let me in i might let you down. your fears are not unfounded but they’re only fears, and you can’t just expect perfection to appear.. but if you plan to, then i’ll wait as long as you think it will take. i’ll wait for you. and i will hold my breath past every cemetery and over every bridge, as if it ever helped. i’ll try my best. you know, for you, i’ll try my best to wait as long as you think it will take. i’ll wait for you. lips like a desert. hands like sieves. heart like a trapdoor. when you push me, it gives. i'll try until i get it right. and i’ll wait as long as you think it will take.
5.
Traffic 03:57
there is an angel on the dashboard on this ride, bathed in 7:30 sun on 95. i know you think you’re all alone, but god i hope you’ll be alright. i’ll let this angel on the dashboard guide me home to you tonight. and the traffic’s not so bad, like we paid for this in advance with all the roadblocks in our past. so if you think you’re letting go, know all you have to do is ask, and wait for the angel on the dashboard to guide me home to you at last. you said that one day i’d have to watch my parents die, and i stayed silent cause i know you’re just half right. though i have faced some things you fear and i have fought some things you fight, i need this angel on the dashboard to guide me home to you tonight. there’ll be an angel on the dashboard when i go, the watchful spirit of a girl we used to know. though we don’t talk much anymore, she still comes round when i am low, a nd i trust the angel on the dashboard to pick me up and guide me home.
6.
Bones 03:57
you say, you say, you say: i’m making a mistake. but i can’t keep my head down any longer or i fear my neck will break. these days, these days: even close friends can’t relate. we’re nothing but neighboring states that fail to communicate. hey, the lights are changing and i can see my fate: that when i get my faith back, it might already be too late. but when we find ourselves alone, we return to what is in our bones. with your back to everything that you ever called your own, something inside will always guide you home. i’ve been had and i have had more than enough, by and of the only thing that i have ever really loved. now a little is too much; all the keys are stuck. we spent each second with each other; now i shudder when we touch. i go out searching for more, and find more than i bargained for: a girl with two different colored eyes and music leaking through the crack under your door. the whole apartment singing the horn arrangement for “ob-la-di, ob-la-da.” singing how life goes, how life goes.. how life goes when we find ourselves alone, we return to what is in our bones. with your back to everything that you ever called your own, something inside will always guide you home.
7.
cord in the wall, other end on the floor. power but nothing worth providing it for. a chest of drawers that’s made for display. i still smoked your cigarettes from across the room, but never got close enough to say a word to you. i just kept choking. i wasn’t made for this waiting around. never content to keep my feet on the ground, i’ll be the devil on your shoulder until you let me in your heart. we were meant for this. so now i’m drinking in the dark. maybe i’ll drive once i’m impaired. i think i like the options offered: i could die or get somewhere. all at once, all good things end; if they don’t, they rot and fall apart. or they explode, so i’ll be the devil on your shoulder until you let me in your heart.
8.
it’s your attention to small details that makes you such a good liar, but it’s your penchant for leaving trails that sets your alibis on fire. avert your eyes; when you look away, you lie. i try to fight when the line is cast, but the hook sets in. and if you only knew that i’ve been watching you dancing around the truth with everything you do, maybe you’d think about finally owning up. you shake like someone who’s got something to hide; is it your lips on his lips or is it your clothes by his bedside? ration replies to find some time to decide if you should swallow the evidence or swallow your pride. watch your mouth; the truth just might slip out. i’ll drown in doubt until an admission lets me swim again. maybe this is the last time i will make it through a call with you. constant complaints and heavy breathing are still nothing new. this is not forever. this was never meant to last more than a few warm nights of summer dreaming. the air is cold and my breath is freezing now now.
9.
Portable 03:09
there’s nothing here but graveyards, because there’s nothing else to do between the hospitals and bars but drink until they bury you. so i spend empty moments with all my vacant friends and hope the means they’ve bottled bring a bottom and an end. “hey hey hey. you are dead weight and i need you to be portable. hey hey hey. if i can’t take you for granted, i can’t take you anywhere at all.” so i watch television, where at least the cases close, and live with indecision on any question that reality may pose. i pump my paycheck into my gas tank every week, drive to cities i don’t know and sing so i don’t have to speak. “hey hey hey. you are dead weight and i need you to be portable. hey hey hey. if i can’t take you for granted, i can’t take you anywhere at all.” still i hold on tight to something pretty, but every night when i’ve got nothing left under her breath she says, the truth hurts less this way, i’m told, but it doesn’t change a thing when i sing to everyone i know:
10.
Ink 04:20
we aim for progress but we’re met with complications, and whether it’s to face or cover up, we smile. the sign by the ocean house says “closed for renovations,” but there’s been a demolition and we’re all just in denial. i sleep in a room with relics of something i pushed through. once cluttered with condolences, it’s empty now. the things we convince ourselves are temporary renew, and it’s time, i think, that we let the ink dry out. i’ve got tattoos of the past and i am kicking up sand with your ghost, cause i’m never more alive than when you’re close. so i’ll keep sand between these pages when i’m retreating from the coast to keep a little bit of you with me when i am needing you the most. i just thought i’d let you know that i see something good ahead. i just thought i'd let you know that i see something good:

credits

released November 20, 2012

Produced by Michael Poorman, Erin "Syd" Sidney and Zac Clark.
Mixed by Brian Scheuble.
Mastered by Doug Van Sloun.

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Zac Clark Burlington, Vermont

In the midst of traveling the world with Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness supporting the hit self-titled LP, RIAA-certified Gold single "Cecilia and the Satellite," tours with Weezer and Panic! at the Disco as well as appearances on the Today Show and Conan, Zac Clark's released two LPs, the theme song to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's TNT show Wake Up Call, and a new LP is on its way in 2018. ... more

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